So you and your friends are chilling on the Island when this cute, handsome fellow comes to your area. He starts a conversation and you (you’re a lady) find out that you are already all over him. Your brain is going bonkers and bananas and you want to follow him home, he is the Mister Perfect you’ve been looking for.
Such is the attitude of some ladies, but before you rush into things. BEWARE!!! I warn you, there is a tendency that your cute, handsome guy wearing a sharp, costly agbada is a Yoruba demon.
A Yoruba demon is a guy (not necessarily of Yoruba origin but it is a bonus point) who is extremely stylish, cute, handsome, promiscuous and rocks the agbada attire well.
Trust me; you don’t want to jam a Yoruba demon.
Now don’t cry yet, I decided to help ladies out there find a way to boycott these Yoruba demons and finally get their Mister Perfect. Falling into the hands of a Yoruba demon is like falling into a hot frying pan, when you try to get out you eventually fall into the fire.
- HE’S FOND OF SAYING “LET’S KEEP US LOW FOR NOW.”
- “BABY, I’M AT ABUJA.” WHEN HE’S AT LAGOS WITH ANOTHER BABE
- “HONEY, DO YOU REMEMBER THAT MY SECONDARY SCHOOL CLASSMATE, YA, SHE’S AT SHOPRITE AND I WENT TO MEET HER.”
- “I’M NOT LIKE THOSE GUYS OUT THERE. LOOK, I’M NOT LIKE THEM.”
- “I DON’T TALK TO MANY GIRLS, JUST YOU AND THAT YOUR FRIEND.”
- “I’M DONE WITH HER. I DON’T EVEN HAVE HER CONTACT.”
- “WHAT EXACTLY COUNTS AS CHEATING?”
- “I’M JUST SEEING HER BUT WE’RE NOT TOGETHER.”
- “I’M GOING OUT WITH MY FRIENDS TO SEE *insert name* SISTER, SHE HANGS AT CLUB *insert name*.
- YOU DON’T KNOW ME? I THINK YOU’RE THE ONLY PERSON IN LEKKI THAT DOESN’T KNOW ME. I *inserts achievements, escapades and feats*
- “*Lady’s Name* IS JUST A FRIEND, WE MAY GO TO CHURCH, WORK, PLAY TENNIS AND GO CLUBBING. BUT, THERE’S NOTHING BETWEEN US.”
- “I WENT TO THE CLUB WITH *insert Lady’s name* ONLY BECAUSE *insert friend’s name* ASKED ME TO SHOW HER DIRECTIONS.
- “I TOLD MY PARENTS ABOUT YOU. MY FATHER SAID HE WILL INVITE US NEXT WEEK.”
“BABY I’M SORRY. MY MUM IS ILL, SHE WAS FLOWN TO INDIA AND MY DAD AND SISTER WENT WITH HER.”
- “I’VE HAD OTHER GIRLFRIENDS, BUT I DON’T CALL THEM AGAIN. BABY, I LOVE YOU.” *shows you his phone where all Whatsapp chats are just hi and hello* “THEY ARE ALL TRYING TO GET MY ATTENTION BUT I DON’T HAVE THEIR TIME.”
- “I HAVE A REGULAR TABLE AT CLUB *insert club name*, JUST COME OVER ON FRIDAY NIGHT.”
So, ladies if he uses at least 8 out of 15 of these expressions he is a Yoruba demon. If he uses 10 out of 15, he is a fellow of Chartered Institute of Professional Yoruba demons. If he uses 12 out of 15, he is a member of the High Council of Yoruba demons. If he uses all of them or more, then he is one of the 12 Commanders-in-Chief of the Secret Order of Yoruba Demons.
I have tried my best to warn you, now share this post to warn others of this threat. Godspeed.